Procrastination by Numbers

[cunningmatt]

They look great totally agree, looking forward to seeing your Daemons. Must resist Tzeentch horde, must...

[cunningmatt]

Well after all that excitement about new Beastmen and High Elf Finecast models, they're up on the GW Website - and it's not really that impressive a hawl. Shame, was looking forward to some Finecast Special Characters.

However in an amazing segway, here's something that is exciting (see what I've done there!). I very rarely blog or tweet about work, but a show that myself and my team have put blood, sweat and tears into (literally I very nearly broke my shoulder during filming!) kicks off this weekend. Camp Orange: The Lost Kindgom starts at 9.30am Sunday on Nickelodeon (repeated Sunday at 8.30pm for you sleepy heads, and extra showings Mon, Tue, Wed). I'd love you to tune in if you're able to, brilliant show (if I do say so myself)!

You can always check out the website nick.co.uk/camporange - let's just say the show blog is written by a blogging genius, I'm saying no more!

Enjoy!!

[fatolaf]

Shameless plug 

[cunningmatt]

Shameless plug 

Shameless plug? Me? Never? On again this afternoon at 4.30pm in case you missed it!! Please watch, I need another series to pay for my new army!! 

[cunningmatt]

Update 79 – Thursday 16th August: Get those placards out, we're Campaigning.

Regular visitors to our true spiritual Mecca, aka the first floor room of the Spreadeagle Pub in Wandsworth, may have seen huddled groups of regular Warhammer players grouped around a map not actually playing any Warhammer. No we're not using a Ouija board to try and contact my social life from the other side of the grave, but instead we're engaged in the brand new narrative driven Warhammer Badlands campaign.

Gareth and Tom are our games masters for a variant of the Badlands campaign featured in The Battle of the Badlands campaign book that popped up around Christmas:



(I knew there was a reason I bought it!)

And myself and five other willing volunteers are taking on the experimental task of being the guinea pigs! In the hopes that we can iron out the teething problems, and allow more clubbers to take part. See we are living through these sacrifices for you dear player. You can thank me later.

I am part of Team Evil, in some shocking typecasting, as my oft-defeated Beastmen take to the table in an attempt to be put back in the figure case in record possible time.

My personal hope with the campaign had been that I could use this as an opportunity to encourage me to finish painting my Beastmen army (just a few bits to go), use some of my oft not used units and maybe even field the odd special character. To start with I wrote a wee bit of background for my army, so here we go...

Rashnrak the Beastlord strode into the clearing, he was the undisputed leader of his tribe, it was he who had crushed the other great tribes of the Badlands, he who had destroyed the Dwarven mines of the mountains and defeated the wagon train of the Empire.

Without word his Great-Bray Shamans arrived. Malagor, scourge of the Empire landed his great black wings furled up and his readied himself for battle. The terror of man, Malagor, had personally seen the wagon train of the Empire flee for their lives before his Gors ran them through mercilessly. Malagor himself plucked the Razor Standard from the Imperial Standard's cold dead hand, presenting it to Rashnrak's personal Centigors.

Delithor was the second Great Shaman of Rashnrak's tribe, his connection to the visions of the Chaos Gods was the strongest of any shaman known in the Badlands. He spoke to Rashnrak in a strange alien voice not of his own. "The humans come, and they bring their allies. This is your chance to rule the Badlands. The Hunter shall become the Hunted once more. As it was, as it always should be." As one the tribe roared, the blood of the hated one will soon be split, for the true Children of Chaos would take what was their due. And it would be Rashnrak who would deliver it.

No, I know it's not funny. I was having an off day. Ok. It might get funny, maybe I am practising to be a serious writer you never know. Anyway if you want to see the other army's backgrounds, maybe decide if any of them are funnier than me (never!), then you should have a look here:

http://ogforum.co.uk/index.php?topic=3142.0

Here's our map of the Badlands, it looks a little a bit like the opening sequence to EastEnders I grant you.



My empire is somewhere to the north, though I'm not sure which way up this photo is! But it's near a forest which seems appropriate.

So far I've turned a bit Skaven, having rolled on the random events table twice and managed to sow bad intelligence sending an Empire army in the wrong direction and used Sappers to destroy a Dwarf mine.

Additionally my main army led by Rashnrak has reached the centre city in the Badlands already, at the same time as the Dwarfs. I am to fight a massive stunty-smashing battle in a week's time to see what happens. Meanwhile one of my armies has stayed behind building mines and fortifications – very technical for Beastmen, and my final army has discover a Shrine to the Forces of Order, which in Beastmen style we've turned into a latrine – don't be disgusted it pretty much says as much in the Beastmen book!!

Anyway all this campaigning on a real map, inspired me, and feeling that three blobs of Blu-Tac weren't really suitable for army markers. I've only gone all sodding Blue Peter on yeah! Yep I found the perfect excuse to empty my substantial Beastmen bits box on the floor an get sticking together:



Apologies for my big toe and a random toothbrush being in shot, need to tidy up (not my toe of course – floor is a good place for it!).
So here's my unit markers:



This one is a spare set of horns from the Cygor/Ghorgon kit. I've cut a few of the hanging pieces of the base of the horns that hang too low below the base, and filled the forehead in with green stuff, so it will look like the horns are sprouting out of a rock. Rather than it being a forehead-less Ghorgon!!



This one is three spare Minotaur shields, the post in the centre is a cut down version of the Gor banner pole, and the horns on the top I believe are a banner top from the Minotaur unit.



The final one is a cut down Ungor banner pole, with banner. I've added a skull to the top from the Gor kit, the spears are again from the Ungor kit and I've based it with some rocks from the Warhammer basing kit.

They're all based on circular Warhammer 40,000 bases (from my Pink Horrors), because, well why not!

And because I love a good painting guide, here's how they were painted up. I know you're not going to read it, but as a treat if you do at the end I've written something very funny!

Stage 1 – Beastmen Army Markers



Base: Steel Legion Drab
Wood: Drybrush Codex Grey, then Drybrush Fortress Grey
Bone: Steel Legion Drab
Silver Metal: Boltgun Metal
Tin Metal: Tin Bitz
Gold Metal: Tin Bitz
Rock: Chardonite Granite
Banner: 1:1 Mechrite Red/Blood Red
Bindings: Scorched Brown
Elf Skin: Dwarf Flesh
Elf Hair: Dheneb Stone

Stage 2 – Beastmen Army Markers



Base: *NO CHANGE*
Wood: *NO CHANGE*
Bone: Wash Nuln Oil
Silver Metal: Wash Devlan Mud
Tin Metal: Highlight 5:1 Tin Bitz/Mithril Silver
Gold Metal: Wash Gryphonne Sepia
Rock: Drybrush Adeptus Battlegrey
Banner: Wash Devlan Mud
Bindings: Wash Nuln Oil
Elf Skin: Layer Elf Flesh
Elf Hair: Wash Nuln Oil

Stage 3 – Beastmen Army Markers



Base: Layer Baneblade Brown
Wood: *NO CHANGE*
Bone: Layer Baneblade Brown
Silver Metal: Highlight Chainmail
Tin Metal: *NO CHANGE*
Gold Metal: Highlight 5:1 Shining Gold/Mithril Silver
Rock: Drybrush Codex Grey
Banner: Add design in Scorched Brown, edged Chaos Black. Layer rest of banner Blood Red.
Bindings: Highlight Scorched Brown
Elf Skin: Wash watered down Ogryn Flesh
Elf Hair: Highlight Bleached Bone

Stage 4 – Beastmen Army Markers



Base: Drybrushed Bleached Bone
Wood: *NO CHANGE*
Bone: Layer Dheneb Stone
Silver Metal: *NO CHANGE*
Tin Metal: *NO CHANGE*
Gold Metal: *NO CHANGE*
Rock: Drybrushed Fortress Grey, then washed Nuln Oil
Banner: Layer design Beastial Brown. Layer rest of banner 1:1 Blood Red/Vomit Brown.
Bindings: *NO CHANGE*
Elf Skin: Highlight Bleached Bone
Elf Hair: Highlight Skull White

Stage 5 – Beastmen Army Markers



Base: Flock with Scorched Grass, then Snow and finally Snow stuck with PVA Glue mixed with Skull White
Wood: *NO CHANGE*
Bone: Layer Bleached Bone, then layer Skulls and larger horns 1:1 Bleached Bone/Skull White
Silver Metal: *NO CHANGE*
Tin Metal: *NO CHANGE*
Gold Metal: *NO CHANGE*
Rock: *NO CHANGE*
Banner: Highlight design Snakebite Leather
Bindings: *NO CHANGE*
Elf Skin: *NO CHANGE*
Elf Hair: *NO CHANGE*
Elf Eyes: Dot Chaos Black and Skull White

POOOOOO! See told you I'd write something funny! They look pretty good to me if I do say so myself, and can also be used as markers or objectives in Warhammer games, so certainly not a waste.

I'll be back again in two weeks, I'm off for a well-earned holiday in Rome! What do you mean you think kid's television producers do no work and don't need holidays?! Bloody cheek.

See ya soon!

[fatolaf]

Another bloody holiday , why the cheek of it 

Nice markers buddy, puts the rest of the group to shame, time for them to pull their fingers out.
Yes I am looking at you Sam and JD

[cunningmatt]

Another bloody holiday , why the cheek of it 

Well my original hotel, the Ecuadorian embassy, is fully booked, so had to go further afield! It's my first holday (excluding business trips) since last June in fairness! v

Nice markers buddy, puts the rest of the group to shame, time for them to pull their fingers out.
Yes I am looking at you Sam and JD

Yay!  I even got a Gold Star from Gareth, sadly he sent this in a PM and not on here, so I have no proof. But I want it noted when we have the Campaign Gold Star table to see who is star pupil! 

[Dave]

Markers look great and per your closing comment, being covered in poo directly matches the beastmen fluff, so I didn't find it funny to see it mentioned there.

[cunningmatt]

Markers look great and per your closing comment, being covered in poo directly matches the beastmen fluff, so I didn't find it funny to see it mentioned there.

Glad you liked the markers, it was fun to model and paint something a bit different! I will try harder with the funny comments.

[cunningmatt]

Update 80 – Wednesday 29th August: Resistance is Futile.

Finally I've succumbed, after years of resisting, I've taken the plunge. Embraced the things that everyone else does. Joined another part of society. No I've not starting having a relationship, don't be stupid. Instead I have joined the world of Warhammer 40,000.

Yeah back in Update 50, you may remember I had my first tester game, which admittedly was a long time ago, and largely uninformative. But it was enough to get me excited about the game, and maybe give me something I can mix and match with Warhammer, as and when I get bored of placing Beastmen back in a box over the course (or should that be curse) of 6 turns.

So jumping on the excitement, if you can call 30 blog entries and about five months later "jumping", I "rushed" out and bought myself the brand new edition of Warhammer 40,000:



See the current edition I am fully up to date. What do you mean there's a new edition? Can't be. Oh FFS!!! You turn your back for five minutes and...

No, of course not. I know what I'm doing (shocking as that may seem)! I've been considering what Warhammer 40,000 army to go with. Primarily, I need not to end up with a vast army with lots of different units and models to collect (though I believe you futuristic people call them squads). That's the key, I can't have another High Elf/Beastmen project. Secondarily I want something fun and different to paint and play with.

So here's my thoughts on each of the armies:

Chaos Daemons – an interesting choice these, as I could potentially use them in both games system (though I will be referred to as a gamey t**t in at least one of the systems). And those brand new models last month are still oh so tempting. However I think that this would pose a basing quandary that would upset me, and I'd never find a way to base them that wouldn't annoy me in at least one game system. Plus surely the advantage of painting Warhammer 40,000 models would be to paint something I can't paint in Warhammer, and that's sort of been missed. No laser, no tanks. Don't think so.

Chaos Space Marines – as a regular Chaos player, Chaos Space Marines do appeal to me, and are up there in the choices. With tanks a plenty and familiar looking models, plus the opportunity to throw my soul in with Tzeentch again they are tempting. But I can't help but thinking I'm painting another Warriors of Chaos army again. And whilst the new Chosen in the brand new box set do look appealing, a lot of the models just aren't quite doing it for me.

Dark Eldar and Eldar – whilst these represent the obvious counterpoint to High Elves and Dark Elves, they've never really appealed to me, on a model basis. I just don't really like them, sorry! And there's no normal tanks, I want to paint tanks with wheels and tracks and tanky bits not odd floaty things. Anti-grav my arse. Actually that would be useful, and anti-grav arse I mean, as I could hover around. Must work on that.

Imperial Guard – Hmmm lots of thanks definitely, but they don't look that exciting to paint, I'm sure I'd get horrendously bored of camouflage patterns by about the first model. And tempting as all those tanks are, the infantry just aren't appealing to me.

Necrons – The futuristic Undead, who do remind me a lot of Star Trek's Borg. Maybe..., but there's nothing really exciting me about these, nothing bad but nothing grabbing me. And no real Tanks again. Big floating boxes, and luminous green, but no tanks.

Orks – The plan to make a small cheap to buy army, never, ever really works with Orks or Orcs. There's just too many of them and too many different options. Certainly not the starter army for me. Plus their tanks are too ramshackle.

Tau Empire – I just don't know anything about the Tau, they don't seem to represent any of the Warhammer races, so I am confused. And I just don't know their background. Models are ok. But again no tanks, and no real appeal – bar their drones which I quite like.

Tyranids – I understand the Tyranids well, but the models and concept don't appeal. To be honest I find them, well a bit odd. I really don't get them – sorry. So no thanks Tyranids.

Space Marines – I have to say whenever I've been flicking through the White Dwarf at the Warhammer 40,000 it's been the Space Marines that I've been drawn to. They have tanks, ones with tracks and guns, they look fun bright colours to paint (exciting as browns, greys and metals of the Warhammer world are), and their infantry look fun too. I've done a bit of research as regards Space Marines and as well as the "normal" variety, there's Blood Angels, Grey Knights, Space Wolves and Sisters of Battle(?! – I'm not sure about these being Space Marines, they're weird either way). And while these variants do look fun, for me the Ultramarines have always lured me in, I love the classic blue power armour what can I say. If they sold power armour in Superdry I'd be buying it in blue.

To that end I've picked up this army book (alright Codex – shut up I'm new!).



And after having a flick through I'm pleased with the background and my choice of Ultramarines. After playing the dying race of High Elves and the marginal race of Beastmen it will be nice to play one of the more dominant races in the setting (backgroundly at least, if that makes any sense).

So there we go, if I have joined the Warhammer 40,000 world with Space Marines – which given the huge range of models and plethora of constant releases doesn't fill me with confidence of not spending a fortune on them. But no, I am going to be good, to be honest much as I enjoyed going crazy with the High Elves and Beastmen, I don't think I'd collect an army to such an extreme again. So it's going to be the models I want only, suggestions welcome of course (but I may ignore them!).

And yes to summarise I have gone for the default colour scheme/chapter in the most basic of basic armies in Warhammer 40,000. See even amongst a nerdy hobby I can still find extra ways to be even more boring than you expect. And you'd lost faith in me hadn't you? You thought I might have become exciting.

All of this explains hopefully why I tried to order Assault on Black Reach not Dark Vengeance from Ol. Sadly it was out of print so I couldn't get him from him, and I was forced to go into a dirty, lesser independent stockist. Blurrggghhh, I feel dirty. Spit on me now I am filth and have committed heresy against OG Games, I need to be flogged!!! I will go to confession soon, and apologise. Promise.

Tempting as it is to open up the box and get Space Marine building:



Warhammer 40,000 is going on the shelf for a little bit, yep I need no distractions from the High Elves and the Beastmen for a while, so until they are done no Ultramarines for me. Sorry, but to be honest I'm only acting now to get Assault on Black Reach before it became a goner.



So after building you up with all that Warhammer 40,000 excitement (but not actually doing anything), it's time to bring you crashing down with the downright disappoint that is my campaigning Beastmen. In gameplay, not campaign design I hasten to add.

Blood in the Badlands Campaign – Beastmen Weeks 1 & 2

Any of you who logged in last time (Update 79) will remember that I built these campaign markers for the Blood in the Badlands campaign, that my Beastmen are currently fighting it out in:



Well each of these tokens represents an army, and after trundling around the Badlands I finally got to fight a battle. Here's how Rashnrak got on (see Update 79 for the initial background):

Rashnrak cursed the Badlands, there was little in the way of beloved forest, just tracks and tracks of wasteland. He had yet to find any pray worthy of the hunt. But his army made good progress towards the central city, and it would bring great joy to his bestial heart to see those buildings demolished. No stone would lie on top of another stone, as it once was it shall be again.

Rashnrak had little time for those who dealt in magic, whilst Bray-Shamans were revered by his people he could barely stand them and their spells. He was a child of Chaos who devoted himself to the bloodshed alone, the humans called this element of Chaos Khorne, for him it needed no name it was what every bone in his body yearned for. Fortunately he had managed to leave Malagor and Delithor in charge of his other herds, whilst he pressed on. He knew they had been busy expanding the realms of uncivilization, and he knew they'd been in league with the devious Skaven. He would have no part of that, but the Skaven had so far provided trappers who had misdirected the armies of the Empire and collapsed a Dwarf mine which were good things. But Rashnrak had no time for these things. Whilst Malagor and Delithor discovered shrines and built mines, he would lead his army to glory and destroy the humans, they would be the hunted.

Rashnrak felt the comfort of having his own personal army with him, no spellcaster would accompany him in his herd, just as he would have no pathetic Ungor in his army. Those wretched sniffling half-humans were only good for repairing his chariots, they were cowardly and could not fight. Preferring instead to sneak around with bows. Instead Rashnrak was accompanied by his trusted Centigor led by Ghorros Warhoof, who was popular amongst the tribes, and he marched with his personal bodyguard of Bestigor. Soon the city would be his. But as the Beastmen arrived he smelt the unmistakable smell of dank mines and beer soaked beards, the Dwarfs had also arrived. He let forth a great roar as his army prepared for battle.

The scenario that Rashnrak's army faced involved advancing lengthways down the table, to try and capture a number of buildings from the Dwarf army. I had the option to both destroy buildings for extra points, and send some of my army as Vanguard – meaning they'd arrive on a table edge later in the battle. In addition Rob's Dwarf army was his exploratory force featuring no War Machines giving me a vague chance of victory.

My Beastmen army was 2,050 points (after getting a bonus 50 points from a mine), my background dictated that Rashnrak would not be accompanied by Ungor or Shamans, believing in his trusty Gor. His army would also have the regiment of renown the Centigor led by Ghorros Warhoof.

Ghorros Warhoof is a special character from the Beastmen book, though he counts as an upgrade to a Centigor unit replacing the champion rather than a Lord or Hero. His background is that he has fathered thousands of Beastmen should he be killed in battle the leadership of all Beastmen is increased for their primal fury tests!

With the above considerations I selected the following army:

Beastlord, Rashnrak – armed with the Stone Crusher Mace (+3 Strength, Strength 10 against any chariots, war machines, buildings etc.), the Talisman of Endurance (5+ Ward Save – like all good magic items I forgot I had this for the whole battle), Heavy Armour and the Chaos Gift Gnarled Hide (5+ Scaly Skin save). 251 points

Wargor Battle Standard Bearer – armed with Great Weapon, Heavy Armour and The Beast Banner (+1 Strength to all models in the unit). 193 points

20 Gor with Additional Hand Weapons, Light Armour and full command. 185 points

26 Gor with Hand Weapons, Light Armour, Shields and full command. 233 points

2 Tuskgor Chariots, Gor armed with Spear, Bestigor armed with Great Weapon. 160 points

9 Centigors armed with Spear, Shield and Light Armour with musician, standard bearer with Razor Standard (unit has armour piercing rule, this standard is provided free within campaign rules – to even this benefit up I forgot to use the banner all game!). Unit is led by Ghorros Warhoof (Centigors in his unit gain +1 Weapon Skill. Should he be killed all Primal Fury tests for remainder of game are taken at +1 Leadership.) armed with the Mansmasher (all unsaved wounds = D3 wounds) and the Skull of the Unicorn Lord (Magic Resistance (2), unit is hated by Wood Elves). 401 points

20 Bestigors armed with Great Weapons and Heavy Armour with full command. 270 points

3 Razorgors. 165 points

3 Minotaurs armed with Great Weapons and Light Armour. 189 points

Total: 2,047 points.

I deployed the bulk of my infantry force, as shown (closet to farthest, from camera – Gors with shields, Bestigor, Razorgor, Gors with hand weapons, Minotaurs):



While Ghorros and his Chariots deployed as reserves to enter on a table edge, in the zone of out of focusness:



The Dwarfs deployed their Quarrellers in the tower, Slayers to the far flank, and two hordes of Warriors with Great Weapons in the village.



Turn 1

The Beastmen advanced towards the tower, whilst the Dwarfs moved up to aid the Quarrellers. The Quarrellers managed to shoot 3 advancing Bestigor.



Turn 2

The Razorgor took an early opportunity to get into combat with the Quarrellers, charging in to the tower, while the Centigors arrived on the flank threatening the flank of the Dwarf Lord's warriors.



In combat the Razorgor killed 8 Quarrellers but suffered 5 wounds in return thanks to the Quarrellers' Great Weapons. The Dwarfs failed their break test, but the presence of the Battle Standard nearby stopped them fleeing.



The Dwarfs countered by charging the Razorgor with the Slayers killing them all, but not before the monsters killed the Dragon Slayer giving him a worthy death.

Turn 3

The Beastmen declare a raft of charges the Bestigor charging the tower, the Minotaurs and Gors with extra hand weapons charging the Slayers. And the Centigors and Gors with shields charging the Warrior block. Sadly this last unit of Gors couldn't make the charge.





Meanwhile the Tuskgor Chariots arrive on the flank and move to threaten the rear of the remaining Warrior unit.



In combat Ghorros attempts to wound the Dwarf Lord hoping his Mansmasher can multiply the wounds, but the Lord's armour is too tough. The Centigors only manage to kill 2 Warriors, in return Ghorros and 3 Centigors are killed. Rashnrak, despite passing his Primal Fury test, only manages a single hit on the Quarrellers. The Bestigor make the kills up to 6, but Rashnrak takes two wounds in return. The Minotaurs completely miss the Slayers, and despite the Gor killing 4 Slayers the Battle Standard Bearer is killed and the Minotaurs flee.



In the Dwarf turn, the Warrior block reforms to face the Chariots at their rear, while the Centigors are wiped out in return for just 3 Dwarf Warriors. The Gor draw the combat with the Slayers and the Bestigor wipe out the Quarrellers.

Turn 4

The Dwarf Lord's Rune of Challenge forces the Gors with shields to charge their unit. The Tuskgor Chariots plough into the other warriors, now facing front on. Meanwhile the Minotaurs rally.

In combat the Tuskgor Chariots do 10 impact hits, all killing and a further 4 Warriors are killed by the chariots, in return for four wounds. Sadly the Warriors are steadfast. Rashnrak's Stone Crusher Mace makes swift work on the tower with the Bestigor finishing off the ruins. The Gor with hand weapons do exceptionally well killing 8 Slayers only losing three. The other Gor fare far worse killing only a single warrior for 9 loses, they flee but easily outpace the Dwarfs.







The freed Dwarf Warriors now charge the Bestigor in the flank.



They kill 8 Bestigor in return for 4 loses, and Rashnrak's unit is forced to flee escaping. The Tuskgor Chariots are destroyed and the Slayers finally break and rundown the remaining Gor block.



Turn 5

The Minotaurs charge the Slayers in the flank, while the Bestigor rally. The remaining Gor block continues to flee.



The Minotaurs only manage three wounds, but it is enough to win the combat and stop the Slayers reforming.

In the Dwarf turn the Dwarf Lord and Warrior horde charges Rashnrak's Bestigor. Although Rashnrak and Bestigor put up a good fight killing 7 warriors they are all wiped out. One of the Minotaurs is struck down but they kill 6 Slayers increasing their attacks further.

Turn 6

The Gors finally rally but they are too far away to affect the game. While the Minotaurs now with 6 attacks each butcher the remaining Slayers.

The Lord and Warriors charge the Minotaurs. 7 attacks each makes no difference if you strike last and are killed by the Warriors first!!



And with that it was time to add up the Victory Points, it was one point a unit, two points for destroying the tower and a point for any other buildings held. Sadly my losses made it a crushing 9-4 to the Dwarfs.

Rashnrak licked his wounds, the battle had not gone to plan. The large blocks of well-disciplined Dwarfs had been too powerful for his Gor to wear down. Particularly as they'd been unable to coordinate their attacks. His best Razorgor had been lost on the initial assault on the tower mainly due to the Dwarfs thrice cursed Great Weapons, which had even allowed the lowly Dwarf Quarrellers to wound him. He regretted having forgotten to put on his Talisman of Endurance now. Still at least his Stone Crusher Mace had allowed him to destroy that tower bringing down the structure on the carcasses of the Dwarfs inside.

Fortunately Ghorros had been found alive, badly wounded but alive, he was busy mating with most if not all of the Beastwomen in the tribe. Which was fortunate as Rashnrak would need a lot more Gor if he was to devastate the Badlands. Though Rashnrak was finding it most distracting seeing Ghorros's unique mating techniques. It was at this point that he regretted purchasing him the book Fifty Shades of Bray.

And on that appalling joke I shall leave it for this week, only to pause and say that in tragic news I have discovered that Procrastination is in fact bad for me. Turns out procrastinators are less healthy, happy and wealthy. See:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-19389707

If only I could decide whether to do something about it or not.