Tale of OG Gamers - High Elves

[maelzch]

one more:
[spoiler]It's like watching people knife each other to death in a skip, but less sexually arousing![/spoiler]

[cunningmatt]

Wednesday 9th February – WEEK 6

Hey welcome back to another week of craziness in my world of hobbying, moaning and procrastinating. Though let's be honest that could sum up any of our lives – you know I'm right!

Warhammer Armies: Orcs & Goblins – 8th Edition

First up let's talk Orcs & Goblins as there's been much excitement on the forum today about the new models available to advance order today, check them out on the Games Workshop site, then come back here and pre-order them!! Can I say first of all how nice it is to see universal praise for the models and no moaning about price, always nice to be upbeat, though I'm sure once we've read the book and decided the army is too hard/too soft that will start!! Although on that note rather too many references to ejaculation from certain Orc & Goblin players for my taste, you're not making it easy for Warhammer players to integrate into society! I've always been a fan of the Savage Orcs and Forest Goblins side of the Orc & Goblin realm, sadly no units of Forest Goblin infantry back – miss those days (I would convert but really converting for units of 40 is never going to happen). But the new Savage Orcs (including Boar Boyz and tandem spear pusher – they may have come up with a better name than my attempt) look amazing and I think everyone is impressed with the Arachnarok Spider (despite the word looking like anorak if you read it quickly) and bar transportation and storage issues the massive size is amazing – though if partners/housemates have arachnophobia you may have to make sure it's stored away safely. And the Goblin Nasty Skulkers look cool too, controversially in a metal blister pack which is almost unheard for new units, especially in the most popular armies – they'll be re-released in plastic in a few months I bet! Lastly that leaves the new army book, yes more expensive, but it is hard back, thank goodness. No more well thumbed falling apart army books, such as my poor Warriors of Chaos book:



It's as if the Sorcerer Lords and Daemon Princes are forming a breakaway army book. Additionally, as pointed out on the "What's New Today" thread on Games Workshop – hard back means they should stay open on the page you want, rather than having to be held open with tape measure and a set of Arcane Ruins on the useful page with all the statistics summarised on! And finally always good to have something weighty to hit annoying opponents over the head with, especially as the mini rule book has meant my 512 page beast no longer gets to play (no euphemism intended). Incidentally I define "annoying" players as people so obsessed with the game they forget they are playing another human being with which they could talk. Instead you get a stream of numbers such as "4s to Wound, that's 8 4's, 5's to save, 2 saves, remove 3" – what, are you talking about? It's like having a conversation with the machine at Argos that announces when your order number is ready to collect – except without the thrill of collecting a new clothes horse at the end. I have found a full-proof way of finding out whether an opponent will be "annoying" or not, is to simply ask the following question as you set up the game "How was your day?", if they reply with something along the lines of "Fine thanks, nothing special, how was yours?" you'll have a fun game whatever happens, if they reply with "Ok." Followed by a brief pause and then "I'm going to roll for spells" – it will be a tiresome game. In fact this method is so full proof if they answer with the later option I don't even bother deploying any models I simply say "Well done you've won" and then leave, this may seem harsh but bare in mind whilst said "annoying" player may not have had a game, they have had probably their longest conversation of the week, and it's right that you are encouraging them into the real world, it's like therapy – except they're unlikely to pay if you send them a bill for £300. I should at this point, point out that I can't recall a single "annoying" player I've played at OG Games, though if I have walked out of game before the deployment phase begun you now know why, next time try and at least feign some interest in a conversation!

Anyway back to the Orcs & Goblins, despite me saying how nice it was no one was moaning, I am going to moan, it's in my fickle nature! Now I know that it's a nice to get into the character of each army but why does it always turn into such a pantomime with the Orcs & Goblins? Every word has to be misspelt and end with a z whichz I'z findz real-ez anoyzingz seez, it's like reading a text written by an 8-year old - annoying! And have you seen today's "What's New Today" post on the Games Workshop website – now I know they feel they need to inject some comedy to compete with my blog, that's totally understandable  . But really it's about as funny as an episode of My Family, sorry GW I know you tried hard, but anything that reminds of me the scrawling across the pages of the White Dwarf that was supposed to be an article by the Mail Order Trolls I mean Trollz is not somewhere I want to go. Am I being too harsh? I let you decide, I accept I am a mean spirited, grumpy git. In fact I actually aspire to that!

I have to admit the new Orc & Goblin models did make me consider starting them as a new army, I have quite a few old models from 4th edition, and the thought of going back to Orcs & Goblins is always pleasing. Anyway this got me thinking, combined with this interesting thread:

http://ogforum.co.uk/index.php?topic=1753.0

Which I am unable to comment in, because I know as much about tournament style playing of Warhammer as Piers Morgan knows about not being an annoying tit. Most of the top armies I've rarely played with or against, in fact I've never ever played a Daemons of Chaos army – must be something to do with requesting a friendly game, that and the fact they often roll for spells without asking me about my day – bitches! Back to the point, I was wondering what order of preference people have to collect the various Warhammer Armies, i.e. what would be your top choice of army to collect be, and which would be second..., obviously don't include any armies you currently own (in reasonable playable form - a handful of old unpainted models doesn't count) as that would be like choosing your favourite child. Though I often think that would be easy, surely it's the child that screams the least, costs the least and is closest to leaving home?! Anyway to get you into the swing of it, here's my thoughts: I already own painted and playable Dwarf, High Elf, Beastmen and Warriors of Chaos armies so that leaves me with 11 choices which I've ranked as follows:

1st Bretonnians – I've been a fan of the Bretonnians since the 5th edition and have loads of models from that era in those famous drawers (we'll find out which one you picked later in this post). I do like choosing colour schemes for my armies, there's something I find quite satisfying about it. So the idea of being able to choose a colour scheme for each knight sounds amazing. Having also seen some nice Bretonnian armies at the club, am pretty sure that when a new book comes out I will be snapping them up.

2nd Orcs & Goblins – Currently riding high because of their new models, would love to get back into Orcs & Goblins as I was in 4th edition. However the thought of painting up so many models frightens me, particularly as I do have a tendency to get at least one unit of every troop type! Plus the constant updating of the Orc & Goblin range could get expensive. However the Forest Goblins are calling... hmmm.

3rd Dark Elves – Worried here about getting caught in the "You've only got this army to win" label, though frankly have you seen me play? Even with the best army type and 15 times more points than you, you'd have a good chance of beating me! So maybe I should go for the edge. Having painted the High Elves the chance to paint their antithesis is appealing, and would be a good excuse to use some purple to.

4th The Empire – Always been a fan of the Empire, especially as they are the army the Warhammer world is seen through, plus most of the terrain represents their building so you could be quite thematic. Nice range and models but all the points of the Orc & Goblins range and number of models apply.

5th Lizardmen – Never been a huge fan of them until I read their new army book in Gran Canaria and was swept in by the background. Models look really straight forward to paint to, as I've found those that are predominantly skin are much quicker to paint than models with loads of fiddly clothes with details.

6th Tomb Kings – My favourite of the Undead aesthetically at least, and would be a very different army to paint with and play than my current armies. However given the comments on their current playability and ease of putting models together, not going to be until after a new book at the earliest.

7th Daemons of Chaos – Again fall into the Dark Elf trap of I don't want to seem like a male hen, however having been a big Chaos fan from 4th edition where it was one uber army, and having loads of old models in a certain set of drawers they do tempt me slightly. But whilst it would be nice to paint the full pantheon of Chaos feel I should try my hand at another evil army first.

8th Vampire Counts – Not bad, but not my favourite Undead, nothing really wrong with them but they don't appeal as much as the other armies and again falling into the Dark Elf trap they don't rate that highly at present.

9th Wood Elves – Poor Wood Elves, it's not their fault, and to be honest I quite fancy painting some greens one colour I rarely use. However Mr Shakey Shakey has theme, and since 4th edition we always tended to collect different armies so as not to tread on each other's toes, so feels naughty. He's about to start a Lizardmen army to, so those may drop down here as well. By the way Mr Shakey Shakey is moving house at present, hence limited internet access which is why he's not on here – and definitely not because I've made him up, and his profile is actually me with a different log in.

10th Ogre Kingdoms – It's not really far, but I wasn't playing Warhammer when they were introduced, so never seen any hype for them in White Dwarf, and whilst I have read their army book it's one of the titchy 88 pages ones which isn't enough to get immersed. I'm sure they're fun, but they just don't excite me.

11th Skaven – sorry rat fans! But the Skaven just don't appeal. There's something I find slightly uneasy about their background, their backstabbing nature and the sewing together of various organisms that I just find too repulsive to love. Besides they make me think of cheese and that won't help the diet.

Any how I invite your thoughts on this topic, please post your own lists of what you'd like to collect. Would be great to see some reasons, and whilst gaming reasons are valid would be nice for some aesthetic thoughts to, as let's be honest this blog is about a lot of things, but it dam well ain't about tactics!

Painting High Elves

The astute amongst you will have noticed we haven't talked High Elves yet, nor in fact have we actually got anything in progress for this month painting wise. Well I decided it was about time my High Elf got some punch, Archers, Eagles and Reaver Knights aren't going to take out any heavily armoured foes. Plus I really wanted an excuse to buy one of the new(ish) High Elf plastics – from late last year. Whilst I was tempted by the White Lions my existing High Elf army (pre Tale of OG Gamers) does have a unit of theme painted up, and one of the objectives of this was to paint up the missing choices. So it was either Dragon Princes or Phoenix Guard, I decided to plumb for the Phoenix Guard, the new models look amazing, and the Lothern Sea Guard could do with some infantry support. I'm reasonably sure Dragon Princes will turn up in the last 600 points.

Now don't get me wrong I love the new Phoenix Guard models, the odd thing about them is there isn't much choice in how to put them together, essentially this is because of the way the cloak interacts with the arms and the spacing of arms on the great weapons. So to ensure you have the correct parts for each build, each component on the sprue is labelled as belonging to a set from A-E, in fact pretty much only the heads are not labelled. This is slightly problematic, as ordinarily I'd cut all the parts from the sprue, file them all and then assemble them in one go. Instead you tend to want to build each unit one model at a time to avoid mixing up the pieces. I saved a bit of time by using a tray with labels (A-E) and cut the pieces laying them with the appropriate letter. Fiddly, but still they are good models:



Also after having trouble ranking my Gors last month (despite planning it very well, I thought!!), I built each model separate to the base then used white tac to plan out the positions, ensuring they ranked before gluing them to the base:



Sorry about the lack of focus (in the picture I mean, there's never any focus in the discussion). I also ensured that Caradryan, Champion of the Phoenix Guard ranked up in the unit next to the command models too. Am tempted to paint Caradryan up next month as I need a hero to round off my 1,400 points, but I'm not sure what people think of the inclusion of special characters in my Tale of OG Gamers army. I know most people speak about special characters as highly as Jason Gardiner speaks of pretty much everyone on Dancing on Ice, so maybe I went. But hang on a minute I'm pretty much the only one doing the Tale of OG Gamers any more so sod it, I'll include what I like. What's that "If I paint up Teclis, you will stab me in the eye with a snooker cue", perhaps I will consult you about any more special characters.

That pretty much is where I am as regards painting this month, I will need to get a wiggle on as I'm filming in Liverpool (don't ask) at the end of the month so time is against me. Apologies if I'm delayed in advance!

The Black Isle – Turn 2

Turn 2 saw Cameron and Clegg's Beastmen army face the two Tom's with Tom H's Skaven attacking Clegg's garrison force and Cameron leading his raiding party against Tom C's cookery inspired Goblin army. Literally I was fighting a Satnav, because I was fighting a Tom Tom get it? A Tom Tom?! Ahh suit yourself.

If you want to see my full army background it's part of Week 3's post on Page 17 of the Blog, though I've tried to include unit types as well as their names in the description. 

Clegg vs Students/Skaven

When I found out Tom was raiding me with his Skaven, personally I was just glad I wouldn't be fighting with the army containing my Beastmen chariots, I hear Tom has a devastating Thunderstomp attack he uses against them, scary! (sorry Tom I couldn't resist!).

I've actually never played the Skaven before, but I've heard bad things so it was time to see if their reputation was deserved. Tom had assured me that he had taken a heavily themed army that didn't feature any of the horrible choices from the Skaven list. As my army was loosely themed around the Coalition Government (see Week 3's post), Tom thought it would be fun to have his army named after the student protestors in a topical clash. Step forward a Plagueclaw Catapult aka The Daily Mail s**t flinger (apologies for the swearing there I promise not to say Daily Mail again), 2 units of Skaven Slaves aka the Humanities Students and the Arts Students, a unit of Giant Rats aka The Labour Party Supporters (I leave you to draw your own conclusions about Tom's political allegiances!), a unit of Clanrats aka the MA Students, a Plague Mortar aka the students peeved off because they're not getting thirty quid a week to study any more, a unit of Plague Monks aka PhD Students and 2 units of Plague Censer Bearers aka the Student Socialist Party. Once I convinced Tom to come down from the roof and stop throwing fire extinguishers the game continued. (For simplicity of stuck to the conventional names for the Skaven units beyond this point!)

Cable (Bray Shaman) started the game badly by rolling two rubbish spells from the Lore of the Wild (and those of you about to chip in with all the spells in the Lore of the Wild are rubbish can sssshhhh now, it's thematic!). The chittering hoard of Skaven swarmed out of the burrows heading towards the Beastmen lines, a selection of plague based weapons exploded around Clegg, but no Beastmen fell and the distance to the Grey Seer limited the magic Cable needed to counter. Clegg was pleased to see the Immigration Limiters (Gors with extra hand weapons) successfully ambush the Skaven and appear at the rear of their ranks ready to hack apart at the Skaven from the rear.

Before Clegg knew it the Skaven were upon him with a raft of charges the various factions of the Student Socialist Party (Plague Censer Bearers) charging V, A and T (the Minotaurs) and The Noisy Common Scum (Ungor Raiders) and the Plague Monks charging the ASBO Abolishers (Bestigor accompanied by David (Battle Standard Bearer) and Cable), whilst the Bestigor held up well against the Plague Monks their double handed weapons cutting through the diseased ratmen the vile Censer Bearers wiped out V, A and T and The Noisy Common Scum without giving them even a chance to strike back, Minotaur flesh flung high as censer balls swung through them shredding muscle and bone. Meanwhile the Slaves turned to face the Immigration Limiters. The Immigration Limiters then charged the Slaves their hatred for the Skaven showing new bounds as they became frenzied as well, whilst their many blows struck true they were simply unable to hit hard enough to wound the Slaves.

Buoyed by their success one set of the Student Socialist Party charged the flank of the engaged ASBO Abolishers and the other the front of the aptly named Student Bashers (Gors with shields and Clegg (Beastlord)). The Plague Censer Bearers devastated the flank of the Asbo Abolishers and with David unable to take down many Plague Monks the unit broke and fled, but tired they ran only a short distance before being cut to pieces! Overhead a diseased load from the Daily Mail flew into the sky only to crash into the Skaven Lords own unit, he suspected foul play, but with so many other Skaven alive it was hard to pin the blame. Elsewhere Clegg had better luck, with two Plague Censer Bearers succumbing to their own fumes, Clegg struck down the remaining four before they could react. Buoyed by their success the Student Bashers charged the remaining unit of Plague Censer Bearers, however Clegg was unable to repeat his feet and the Beastmen lost the combat just, it was enough for them to break without the presence of David and his trusty army standard. The unit speedily fled, however not speedily enough. The Gors rolled an impressive 10, but the Censer Bearers rolled an 11. Curses. Only the Immigration Limiters were left, bogged down by the Skaven Slaves then the Giant Rats charged them in the flank, having seen the rest of the army being mown down by the Censer Bearers they promptly fled the table. A quick and brutal victory for the Skaven.

Total destruction and those were the nice bits of the Skaven army! Bloody hell. The Plague Censer Bearers personally killed all but 1 of my units – bloody things.

On the plus side I did roll a 6 for my Gold, (the same as the sum of all the previous games), and only Clegg suffered a lasting injury which was that he feared Skaven – and who the hell can blame him!

Still it's probably my own fault, earlier that day I'd had pest control come and put down more poison to deal with my mouse problem in my flat, I guess that's karma for you!

Cameron vs Goblins

The Beastmen army crashed threw the forest at the crack of dawn, without the light of dawn the army's formation was in disarray but then so would the Goblins be, and they closed in for the kill. The majority of the Beastmen army was positioned on the left-hand flank, whereas Tom had rolled a surprisingly large number of 1s and 2s during deployment meaning his army was heavily waited towards the flanks.

The attack began as Cameron unveiled his policy on Goblins, the Benefits Vultures (Harpies) swopped from the tower and landed just in front of the Rock Lobber, positioning themselves to avoid being attacked by any of the other greenskins. The Banking Bonus Bouncers (Minotaurs) launched an early charge against a unit of Wolf Riders that had advanced at the beginning of the battle, but they fled out of the brute's reach. In response the Goblin line rumbled forward with Chariots and Wolf Riders threatening the Banking Bonus Bouncers' flank, a unit of Spider Riders turned to shot the Benefits Vultures, but they only shot a single Harpy so the unit continued it's advanced towards the greenskins' war machines as a giant rock sailed over their head, heading straight towards the Banking Bonus Bouncers, the rock slew a single Minotaur outright however the rest survived the rubble though embarrassingly they were wounded by a short bow form a Wolf Rider meanwhile the Doom Diver missed Cameron and The Deficit Reducers (Gors). The Beastmen responded by ploughing into combat, Hammersmith (Tuskgor Chariot) ploughed into the Snotling Pump as Cameron, limited by the spells he could cast reinforced the vehicle with Wyssan's Wildform, so powerful was it that the chariot simply smashed through the Pump Wagon destroying it on impact before ploughing into the Snotlings, though a solitary Fanatic was released spinning towards the Beastmen lines, who was then shot to pieces by the Common Scum (Ungor Raiders). The Tuskgor chariot caused an impressive 6 impact hits, and released a Fanatic from the nearby Night Goblin unit - Tom decided to send the Fanatic toward the Ungors and Gors heading his way rather than the chariot, but it fell a few inches short. I ummedd and ahhhedd about overrunning the chariot into the Snotlings (they were 15 bases), but felt it was better I pinned the Snotlings in place rather than let them pin a more valuable unit in place. Over the otherside of the battlefield City (the other chariot) was unable to reach the Squig Herd, however the Out of Hours GPs (Centigors) were able to crash into a Goblin chariot denying it a valuable charge), the Banking Bonus Bouncers headed towards the Forest Goblin Spider Riders who fled, again the Minotaurs were denied combat their blood now boiling. Meanwhile Cameron summoned an Amber Spear which flew out of his hands impaling the Black Orc Warboss who was moaning about pots, pans and Jamie Oliver, penetrating his ward save the arrow did 2 wounds on the boost. The Benefits Vultures attacked the Rock Lobber whose payload had been so deadly on the Minotaurs earlier, the Harpies slaying every crew member before they could react. The Out Of Hours GPs used the spears to inflict serious damage on the Wolf Chariot which fled through a wall, Rocklobber and Harpies to get off the battlefield chased by the Centigors. Despite having inflicted serious damage this turn I had, had atrocious luck with my Leadership tests the Centigors failing their Primal Fury test (and their reroll for being Hungover - random special ability assigned to them at beginning of battle) and then failed to restrain and pursued the Wolf Riders getting themselves caught on a wall, fortunately they passed the dangerous terrain test, but were now stuck in a position where they wouldn't be able to threaten any Goblin units. The Harpies also failed their reform roll leaving them pointing in the wrong direction. Never have I rolled so many 9s, 10s and 11s for Leadership tests. Seems wrong to moan as I was winning, but was concerned as this exposed my units to being attacked later.

The Spider Riders regained their courage returning to their flight and shooting at the Banking Bonus Bouncers though they were unable to penetrate their tough hide. The Wolf Riders swept round the flank of the Beastmen only for the Hand of Mork/Gork/a Dork/someone from York/a Champagne Cork/a Roasting Fork with a bit of Pork on the end (Cameron couldn't tell) to sweep them into the flank of City (the unengaged Tuskgor Chariot). Meanwhile a Wolf Chariot and the Night Goblins charged into the Common Scum, despite netting themselves the greenskins killed all but one Ungor who turned to flee but was stabbed in the back by a dirty Night Goblin, from under a net. Both chariot and Night Goblins pursued into the The Deficit Reducers (Gors), accompanied by Cameron (Great Bray Shaman) and Ed (Wargor Battle Standard).

The Benefits Vultures took off and landed in front of the Doom Diver ready to butcher the crew at the next opportunity, the Out of Hours GPs were tangled up on a wall due to their clumsy nature and were only able to reposition themselves The Centigors failed their fourth leadership test in a row, as they attempted a free reform and instead simply positioned themselves as best they can to face the approaching Squigs. The Banking Bonus Bouncers charged the Forest Goblin Spider Riders who were lead by the Battle Standard Bearer bearing the Wailing Banner, despite crushing three with the full force of the impact the Minotaurs cowered and found it hard to hit their foe, but still it was enough to forced the Forest Goblins to flee who were mown down before the Minotaurs ploughed into the flank of the third Wolf Chariot. Cameron drew the powers of the wind of magic to transform the Deficit Reducers with Wyssan's Wildform helping to mitigate the impact of the Wolf Chariot and cancel the effects of the Night Goblin's nets. With their enhanced frames the Gors beat off the Night Goblins who fled, however the Wolf Chariot stubbornly refused to die. City and the Wolf Riders continued to fight, with the Tuskgors unable to fight no one could gain the upper hand.

The Black Orc Warboss shouted the f-word, closed down a kitchen, and charged headlong at the Deficit Reducers, Cameron laughed as the Black Orc failed to make the distance huffing, puffing and swearing. The Squig herd ploughed into the front of the Out of Hours GPs, in a close battle two Centigors were killed, as were two Squigs, but the noise of the Centigor's horn was enough to send the Squigs amoke exploding through the Centigor unit killing another two. The Centigors nerve broke and they fled away from the Squig based carnage The Centigors failing their 7th consecutive leadership test, unable to gain Primal Fury as they were! The Minotaurs launched a bloody attack smashing the Goblin Chariot to pulp and increasing their frenzy. Whilst the Gors destroyed the remaining Goblin Chariot.

Cameron was feeling in a wicked mood and so charged forward towards the Black Orc Warboss to grant him his wish. Meanwhile the Banking Bonus Bouncers failed to reach the remaining unit of Squigs, the Benefits Vultures charged and ripped apart the Doom Diver and the Centigors decided to rejoin the fight finally passing a leadership test! The Black Orc Warboss bellowed a challenge, smelling the breath of a commoner, Cameron bravely pushed Ed the Battle Standard Bearer forward to face the challenge, who was promptly cut to ribbons, despite this the Black Orc Warboss's resolve wavered for a moment in the face of ranks of charging Gors and he turned and run, Cameron sticking an axe in his back as the Gors caught him and mauled him to death. And with that, despite it only just being dawn the sunset and the battle was over – odd thought Cameron The pub was closing so we ended it then!

With the Goblin dead far outweighing the Beastmen dead and the remainder of Tom's army being surrounded it was a Beastmen win! And I rolled 9 for my gold, still below average, but better than a Polaris missile in the genitalia as I always say. Rolling on the critical injuries table Ed scored a 6 meaning he'd survived and his troops impressed by the recovery now treated him as having 1 higher Leadership, which now meant Ed was now technically a better leader than Cameron – make of that what you will.

At this point I should say big thanks to both Toms for being great opponents and fun to play and putting up with my moaning, turns out I moan whether winning or losing! Look forward to playing you guys again. Also the reason that the battle report I lost in is much shorter than the one I won in is not because of me sulking, it was just a very quick massacre!

Turn 3 loomed and despite two wins out of four, my poor dice rolling means I'm still in the bottom 3. Next turn I'm raiding Ritchie's Dwarfs and campaign leader (gulp) Toast aka Andrew will be raiding me and probably turning the Beastmen to Toast with his Warriors. Stay tuned for more exciting developments, or come to the club and boo Cameron for yourself!

What's In the Box? – The Results

That pretty much leaves us with this month's What's In the Box? – thank you for all the entrants a record breaking 6 this month. Particular thanks to "Evil Fuzzy Doom" who has logged on all the way from Australia, just for this post – which proves that no matter where in the world you are everyone needs s**t to read to procrastinate and avoid doing useful things.

Mate, the only Shakeaways in Australia is on my bus route. I AM SO EXCITED. I CAN GO THERE ALL THE TIME. 

Thank you for opening my eyes to its wonder and glory.

Oh and glad I opened your eyes to the glory of Shakeaway, though I am slightly jealous there is one on your bus route (I presume it's a shop somewhere near the stop, rather than an in-flight trolley service, that would be good on the Northern line), however in fairness if there was a Shakeaway in Clapham I would need one of those super-size ambulances, the NHS have been buying, to get me to hospital and have my stomach pumped after overdosing on Shakeaway goodness.

As always Cheryl, my house plant, oversaw the proceedings to make sure the draw was fair. Though I am a bit concerned she's a bit worse for wear, she's gone all droopy and isn't taking up her water – maybe it's the stress of America:



Looking at the board as it stands we can see boxes number 3, 6 and 25 have already been picked:



All the entries were loaded into the Shakeaway cup:





Before Cheryl drew this month's "winner":



Yes it's number 14, well done Tom who has picked the "winning" number twice now, commiserations to Ol and Lee who despite picking the same number for the last four months have still yet to be drawn. Don't worry I should imagine in about 32 months' time your box will get drawn. Sorry guys!

So let's see What's In The Box numbered 14, by the way I've vacuumed the carpet after last time's embarrassing hair incident!



And perhaps appropriately for today it's an Orcs & Goblins box:


We've got a Savage Orc Boar Boy with Spear, more exist in another box, possibly with a consecutive number (there's a clue for next time):



A Savage Orc Shaman on Boar, which I think is a particularly good model:



Morglum Necksnapper, Black Orc Warboss, who annoyingly I seemed to miss when compiling the Forgotten Special Characters Advent Calendar – god dam it, it was hard in the last weeks!



And some of the first of the "new" style Orcs, that didn't have the more cartoon-esque face, here's an Orc Big Boss on Boar:



And a unit of Orc Boar Boyz with spears for him to lead:



There's a musician and standard here, not sure if there's a designated champion model or if the Big Boss was meant to lead them, it was from around the time when Games Workshop mucked around with command models, and there often wasn't a full set for each unit.

What's In the Box? will probably return in March, so you'll get another go then. Thanks again for your entries.

Just before I go some random bits and pieces...

This seems like the best place to post this, just watching the latest Charlie Brooker, only a few minutes in and already some ace quotes:

there aren't many shows that make me genuinely laugh out loud this much, it's ace!

Yes Charlie Brooker's show is amazing, I quite like 10 o'Clock Live with him on as well (though it does clash with gaming nights), but if you hear him say any jokes you've seen in this blog you know he copied me not the other way round.

I don't play Warhammer 40,000, but if I did I think I'd paint up a Stormraven in the colours of Thunderbird 2. Am I the only person who has thought that?

Oh and I know it was a while ago in the blog, but do let me know your lists of what armies you would/wouldn't collect if you were/weren't already collecting them, if that makes sense. Would be interesting to know.

Next week it will be Valentine's Day, oh joy! So I'll probably be crumbling Valium and Prozac onto a Pizza for 1, expect a vitriolic rant next week!!!!

[maelzch]

Another good update matt, makes for much more interesting reading on my commute than today's doom rag, or newspaper as it's more commonly known.

I'll have you know I'm still frantically painting away on stuff for the Tale, I'm aiming to get my month 5 stuff up by the end of the weekend (better late than never)

My choice of armies I want to do is less based on the playability of the army, or if I like the models, it tends to appear once an idea latches onto me like some kind of brain leech! The current ideas that are top of my "I can't start another[/] army" list are:

'Barrow Kings of Albion' - A tomb kings army, but all converted into zombie celts and such
'Malal's uprising' - a daemon army *gasp* based around the fifth forgotten (due to IP) chaos god, Malal, who was the god of distrust and betrayal. This army would be a chance for me to use the fantastic Belakor model, as he is the deamon prince of Malal. As Malal's colors are black and white, I can see that I'd use a lot of OSL when painting this army.

Dammit, I need to clear out some stuff!

[Dave]

Baring in mind I've only got my dwarfs and now WE painted I've got plenty of options, but as per my recent thread about hoarding stuff I've a few options.  Armies which I'd most like to do next:

1. Lizardmen - I'm kind of half way there with them just now so it's a bit of a cop out answer but I really like the figures and once I started reading the background I was truely captivated.

2. Tomb kings - I basically want an excuse to use a big old unit of mummies from my undead collection, but again the whole egyptian look and theme and idea of animated constructs really appeals. If I could find suitable oriental figures I might consider doing the good old terracotta army using their rules but sure it's been done before.

3. Daemons of chaos - again it's an old project revisited, I've got a host of the slanneshi stuff all badly painted from my previous excursion into daemons when they were the weak part of the combined chaos book.  Only thing keeping me away was the 'it's pure filth' sign that you get attached to you for taking daemons.  I thought 8th was going to remove that, but it seems not.

4. Ogres - I like the bigger models and as a result lower figure count to paint which keeps tempting me to try and do a 'different' paintjob on them.  A while back there was some nice tzeench blue and khorne red ogres floating about, really piqued my interest in them.

5. Warriors of chaos - This one rages up and down my list of what I fancy doing.  At it's peak I bought a whole armies worth of stuff, then promptly lost interest and they all sit untouched in a box to date.  Again favour something a bit different from the norm and would go for something along the lines of sigvalds stying, super crisp clean and golden pretty boys.

6 Skaven - I painted up the IoB clanrats and had a really good time doing it, which again is tempting me to get a skaven army.  The fact that they're a dime a dozen right now is putting me off.

7 Dark Elves - but specifically because they can do a decent all mounted army.  I like the idea of a hugely mobile force and nobody else quite offers the same options to do mobile, and good, at the same time.

8 Bretonnians - Love the idea, hate painting horses.

9 Beastmen - Lack of any real variety in the army, everything is a fur and flesh beast, just variations of theme.  But I like the background of them that exists in my head (not read the recent books).

10 High Elves - Dunno, used to have an army of them, but now just dont feel the love, probably due to them being rather popular round my way.

11 VC- this is another one which swings up and down the list, but anything fun now seems to be considered a bad choice, which is tempting me again, but you know you'd be tarred with that brush.

12 Orcs & Goblins - just never really been my thing

13 Empire - never done it for me really, just a historical army plus some silly tank and rockets

[EvilFuzzyDoom]

I've always loved Brian Nelson's Orcs. I have that same Big Boss painted up, but unfortunately I dropped a LCD monitor on him a little bit and he needs a few repairs.

When it comes to want/not want for Fantasy armies, hrmm...

1. Orcs: I always wanted to collect Orcs when I was a little tacker; the green appealed to me I guess. I had a go when the BfSP box came out but my money ran out and that was the end of that.

2. Warriors of Chaos: I've just started working on a thousand points of 'em (had them lying around, it turns out!) so yeah, I guess I like them. I've wanted to play a Tzeentch-themed force in 40k since before it was either wise or the models were available, and figured that this was close enough.

3. Beasts of Chaos: Because they look awesome. And easy to paint. And awesome. Apparently they're total pants though. On the plus side, I could blame the army when I get my butt kicked from here to Naggarond...

4. Wood Elves: Mainly for the Dryads. Those models are awesome. I might grab some just for funsies or Daemon stand-ins at some point. My ex-girlfriend is also (sort of) collecting Wood Elves though, so it might get a little awkward if I started on them for reals though.

5. Dwarfs: Because I could pop on a fake beard and do a reasonable impression in a pinch. And the whole "gunline" idea seems like it might just be simple enough for me to pull off despite my tactical capacities.

6. Skaven: Doomwheel. Purrrty. Although the sheer quantity of models involved is a little off-putting. I play Imperial Guard, after all, and I think I could only survive painting one horde army.

7. Ogre Kingdoms: Apparently they're super easy to collect. But a friend of mine plays them and, well, I'm not sure my painting standard would hold up on that scale over a whole army. I might go cross-eyed and obsessive over them.

8. Tomb Kings: By gum they'd be easy to paint. Spray & wipe painting scheme? Yes please.

9. Vampire Counts: A little easier, but still a little less appealing than Tomb Kings for some reason. Couldn't say why.

10. Empire: I have at least 3000 points of them lying around. They were an unanticipated gift. I just can't bring myself to paint them since many of them are spectacularly awkward conversions, and I could never buy any more of them while owning so many of them already. I've decided to pretend the army just doesn't exist in the meantime.

11. Daemons of Chaos: I'm pretty sure I'd either get bored painting all one colour, or claw my eyes out trying to justify why I'm shredding 15 years of fluff indoctrination: "BUT... BUT... DAEMONIC ANIMOSITY! KHORNE DOESN'T WORK WITH SLAANESH! ARGH!"

12. Bretonnians: They're probably more appealing than the undead armies, to be honest, but a friend collects them and... well they just don't tickle my fancy.

13. Lizardmen: I tried once. They were purple and yellow. I don't think I could ever relive the horror.

14. Dark Elves: Bloody hell there are a lot of armies around, aren't there? It's like Fantasy tries to make up for not having hundreds and hundreds of Space Marine variants by having actual different armies.

15. High Elves: Who are these people and what are they doing here? Pointy-eared gits.

[Veldemere]

The legend rolls on, this is great!! And now we get homework from the plog 

I am elso enamoured of the dichotomy of the man who gets annoyed when gamers don't speak with him, a rage only matched by the vitriol targetted at a woman for daring to speak with him on his trip to work, you are a complex chap Matt.

I am obviously disgusted that what's in the box is still so open to abuse, O&G eh, how convenient! I have asked wikileaks if they have any information on this subject, I also have the News of the World tapping your phone just in case. As soon as this series of million pound drop finishes (I say million pound, but it is then subject to stupid tax administered by contestands plainly chosed by how much peroxide they use per year and then ultimately ends up as a 50/50 for £20,000) I think the draw needs to be televised, I suspect the role of Cheryl will have to be played by Davina, sorry.

As for armies, I still think Ogres are the most fun army in the game and I enjoy them I am really hoping they get an 8th ed soon. As I am still in the process of constructing the dwarves and space marines I can resist new armies, only just. I have tried most armies over the years but the ones I am still tempted by are the Bretts and Tomb Kings.

EDIT- Oh, and old people like me are not keen on the blue text, it hurts my eyes

[Veldemere]

I've always loved Brian Nelson's Orcs. I have that same Big Boss painted up, but unfortunately I dropped a LCD monitor on him a little bit and he needs a few repairs.

Seriously, I totally misread that I actually thought you were painting and dropped and LSD, that would be interesting but big boss would be a really bad idea!! 

[fatolaf]

Armies that I would ike to coolect for painting/gaming purposes..

1) Bretts - Want to do a TK / Brett cross over army

2) Ogres - Love the models, but can't think of a theme yet

3) Dwarves - Using the new Mantic models, but would never ever want to play with them, with out a doubt the single most boring army in the world IMO (joint top with VC actually)

4) O&G - love the new models, love my Black Orcs that I have had since the plastics came out (used them in my Chaos Dwarf army) but the prospect of painting another horder is frighteneing..

So currently I am getting on with doing my WoC / Beasts army, thinking of using some savage orcs as Gors to really mix it all up


And I tell you if Box 17 does not get picked next month, Cheryl fecking gets it....

Great blog again sir....

[Dave]

3) Dwarves - Using the new Mantic models, but would never ever want to play with them, with out a doubt the single most boring army in the world IMO (joint top with VC actually)

Only if you insist on building a 'competitive' build.

[fatolaf]

Only if you insist on building a 'competitive' build.

More based on the total lack of vareity. Only infantry, no magic phase, no cavalry, no monsters, and I dont like war machines....Never been the army for me I'm afraid...

Plus I dont think I have ever had a fun game against them at a tournie, total hobby killer for me..